Looking to get down to 'business'

From: Craigslist

Posted: June 27, 2009, 7:36AM CDT

Location: Downtown - Millenium Park, Chicago, Illinois

Section: Men seeking men.

Ad:

Morning BJ. NSA from Bi Handsome Biz travellee. - 34

"Handsome Married Guy. In town on business. Looking for other VGL str8/ bi guys to service this morning. Looking for now. Please be clean. I can host. five eight. one sixty five. seven uc. worked out muscular bod. mod. hairy. middle eastern background."

~

I'll tell you what, the Chicago section on Craigslist has the highest number of men looking for men when they're in town on business. It's unreal.

~

He says: Looking for straight/bi guys.

But: Aren't straight guys looking for pussies and not dicks?

He says: Muscular bod.

But: He has a BMI of 25.1, if his measurements are accurate. That means that he's overweight.

He says: NSA.

But: He's MARRIED. Marriage always means that there's QUITE A FEW STRINGS.

~

Well, this is the ad I had to use Urban Dictionary to decipher. I had no clue what VGL or seven uc meant. To clarify for other people like me...

VGL = Very Good Looking.

Seven uc = Seven inches, uncircumcised.

Um, EW.

Even the gay guys I know say that circumcised is prefered. UC just looks like a reeeeallly ugly worm. Not that a dick is attractive anyway, but the uc factor makes it ten times worse.

ANYWAY, what I find worse about this ad is that he's looking for STRAIGHT MEN to give him a blowjob. Maybe you need to look up the UD definition of straight:

"not gay"

I rest my case, you fuckrat.

P.S. The picture came up when I googled 'shady business.' I couldn't resist putting it.